finally,the wordiings can be seen...and ii diid iit all on my own..
pandai yaNa~!the purpose of miie bloggiing iis not about how clever ii am...iit siimply iis bcuz ii am stressed up to the max!ii fear for my friends...Khalidah,Nina & the rest of the ghurlls...ii noe they arent doiing that great for theiir results...ii badly hope that they could move on to the next level and not be left behind thiis yr..insyallah!..''ii am veriie diisappoiinted iin eu..''ii tried my best to make him proud of miie...but alas~..not once diid ii made hiim proud...not liike Faiz...who keep wiiniing medals & trophies ...ii can clearly see...WE can clearly see that he much much much adored my younger brother than miie...not that ii am compariing or whatsoever...
ii siimply cant see why he cant be proud of miie for who ii am...why cant he accept miie for who ii am?.why cant he accept the way ii do my stuff?..why cant he siimply accept the thiings ii had,have & goiing to have?''why eu do prefect duties ah?..wasting your time kan?..why you do ur library duties?wasting ur time kan?..asal selalu alek lambat from skewl?wasting your time kan?..why do eu have to go out on Fri to go lib?wasting your time kan?..why do eu have to use your hp?.wasting your time kan?why do eu have to watch tv?wasting your time kan?..why do eu have to listen to Ria?wasting your time kan?...''so...all thiis whiile ii have been wastiing my tiime...even iif ii diid that...even iif ii followed your rules & regulations,would eu stiil love miie for who ii am...would eu stiil respect miie for who ii am...would eu stiill treat miie for who ii am..
ii diid my best in my a-math...ii did my bloody best for my Eng...you couldnt understand that kan..?you always want to show off wiith your friiends of my results kan..?you thiink ii dunt know?...you wouldn't want to lose face infront of your own mother kan,that ii am failing badly..
liisten father,
ii am faiiling...yeah! so what...just accept iit would ya?so what kena retain...what?...where to put your face..?just erase ur face..!!...have eu ever felt how ii would feel when ii failed my results...how embarrassed ii am when ii faced my other ghurlls...the cleverer ones..like the K twins...atikah...shariffa...ain...filza..eu never ask kan why ii take a-math...eu noe why...cuz that is the only solution...you noe 3/1 & 3/2 would not be one of the choices siince your daughter herself couldnt take pure sci...3/4 seems lousy to you...nanti your friends kan tanyer "zaini,ur daughter class aper?..3/4?tu class average jer kan?not taking a-math ah niie? 3/5 iis a no-no option to eu siince iits liike ii am a failure iif ii actually went into 3/5...so whats left?..3/3?!....
you noe ii am weak iin math...whats more a-math...ii must be the crazziest ghurll to take that bloody subject..yet eu claiimed that ii didnt studied for that particular subj..eu diidnt realised ur daughter was up the whole night during MYE ,studying that subj...but what did she get?...a
measley F9 as a result...eu scolded her...eu cursed her...eu called her st0opiid...but she kept iit quiet...she diidnt even complain to her LTG...she kept iit all inside to make her more determined...now...she still failed by 14 marks...and what was your response?.!
''
ii am very diisapoiinted iin eu..you cant even do a siimple test..eu can siimply get out of thiis house iif studiies arent iimportant to eu''iis that your way of halau-iing miie out of my very own house?..iis that iit?..just iimagine....what would eu do to miie iif ii actually kena stay back..?what would you do?...kiil miiee?halau miie?..ii thiink eu oreadiie just diid that...
eu noe father...after what eu saiid to miie just now,ii siimply dunt care iif ii failed or ii passed...ii can never meet your expectations...ii can never make eu proud...ii can never make eu treat miie for who ii am...why should ii bother kan..?and eu dare claiim that eu are my father?!*iit has been a hell of a day for miie today*
_yaNadarlZ_
